81 Days

That is how many days I have until I graduate.

To be this close is so hard to comprehend.  I have one final simulation this Thursday, one more roles transistion seminar Monday night, and my last final exam ever (outside of HESI and NCLEX) on Wednesday next week.  I am not sure how to feel about being done with classes.  I have been in classes for the last 3 years, so it is just weird that it is all almost over.  I have been wanting this for myself for so long, and a part of me never felt confident that I would ever achieve it.  That something would happen to blow it all up, or I'd give up, or who knows what else I thought.  I guess I had been so convinced that I'd eternally be a college drop out, that it is hard to believe that I can say that isn't true anymore.

I start my Capstone clinical rotation the second week of March.  I only know my schedule for the first week of which days I will be with my preceptor, so I have this big question mark over my life because I can't plan for anything.  I am a planner, and this drives me nuts!  I am also nervous about what I am going to do about work.  Normally, I have been able to get off of work very easily on Saturdays, but two girls just quit.  Two full time girls.  So, I am going to feel so bad when I have to tell my boss that I have to be at the hospital on the weekends my preceptor works.  And not being able to take off any more Saturdays than that, I am dreading setting up my schedule with the hospital, because I usually try to throw some Saturdays in as an option so that my manager there has more to play with.  However, if I have to give some of my Saturdays to my Capstone, I can't give anymore to the hospital.

I am looking forward to getting back to a normal life of working, coming home, making dinner with Mike, and relaxing.  Being able to make plans with people without worrying about what test I have coming up.  I am ready for us to have our own home again, with the return of our privacy.  I miss my Hello Kitty toaster, and my coffee maker, and my pink Kitchenaid mixer.  I miss not having to listen to the dog bark up a storm because a leaf fell from the tree outside.  I miss a lot of things.

There are so many things that are up in the air for me right now, but I am excited that a new chapter is going to begin soon!!