Self-Evaluation Sucks!

So, I felt like I had a great first day at clinicals. I did everything that I was told to do, got to help with some things that I have never had any experience with before. So I was feeling pretty good until I sit down today to do my clinical evaluation.

Let me explain a little bit. We have this form that our instructors require us to fill out after each clinical day. Then we e-mail it to our clinical instructor, they review it, and put their feedback. This helps us to recognize the things we are doing well and the things we need improvement on. These evaluations are also how we are graded.

The problem I had doing this first evaluation is that our first clinical day this week wasn't really a typical clinical day. We are still pretty fresh, we weren't able to do a lot of things yet. So we did a lot of observation. I felt pretty dumb writing "I observed....blah blah blah" all over the place. This is also not a chance to write a step by step summary of your day. So I didn't want to put down things that I considered to be CNA skills.

I have a pounding head ache now because I wish I had the ability to do this self-evaluation better. I also didn't like that there were things on this form that didn't seem to apply yet, but I didn't want to leave anything blank! This has completely thrown off my entire day. I wanted to get so much studying down, and I wasted way too much time stressing out over this evaluation.

I e-mailed it to my teacher, I am not satisfied with it, but I can't spend anymore time on it. I wrote her a little note to tell her I struggled with it. If for no other reason, than to make it known I know I sucked at it.

Ugh, so this is not giving me a good feeling about my Patho test tomorrow, because I feel horribly unprepared for it. This is it, I am not doing any other social outings if I feel its gonna screw me over on studying time. And I am not letting myself take a nap after clinicals again. I have to do things according to my plan from now on.

So, I'm gonna get off of here and get my butt to some studying!!